In a strange altercation that authorities are still trying to understand, Tim Tate, webmaster of the insanely popular website Street Tech, was nearly killed by a mountain goat this Saturday. Apparently Mr. Tate was attempting to involve the animal in some sort of bizarre pagan ritual and the goat didn’t take kindly to Mr. Tate’s advances. “He was always such a nice, quiet fellow,” said Gareth Branwyn, the cybernetic organism that runs the website. “I can’t imagine him being involved in anything like this. Last I heard, he was very involved in helping the Girl Scouts sell cookies.” Mr. Tate is currently in the hospital recovering from his injuries.
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